British brainteasers (UK)

When I first arrived in Britain 34 years ago, one of the things that caught my eye were the words “Free House” over the pub.  Wow, I thought, that’s very generous of them, letting people drink free.  It turned out to mean “not tied to a particular brewery”.

These days banks have signs over their ATMs, announcing “free cash withdrawals”.  This does not mean you can withdraw cash for free as in you’re given the money, but that it is free of a handling fee—which used to be imposed on people who didn’t have an account with that particular bank, but is now waived so that one can withdraw cash from any bank in addition to one’s own without paying the handling fee.  Herein lies an issue of parsing: is it free cash or is it free withdrawals?

Sandy, a Chinese academic over on a British Council grant, went on a hike with the university’s rambling club, and during the lunch break, as often at a pub as it is possible to arrange on such walks through the countryside, she saw a sign outside the door saying:  “No travellers allowed.”  Being a visitor to the British shores, she felt that she could perhaps be called a traveller and was therefore rather concerned that she was being barred from English pubs.  More importantly, why?  I had to explain to her that it is a term used for referring to gypsies.

Another thing I'd see, when I first arrived in 1977, was the sign at petrol stations for what was available. Under TOILETS I'd see TWO STROKES, which rather alarmed me, bringing back memories of the diminutive deputy headmaster, Mr Wee, at the school where I did three months of temporary teaching in early 1973 while waiting for my 'A' level results from Cambridge. It was Mr Wee who sorted out the problematic students -- he might've stood at 4'10" but he had a big cane. My English friend told me TWO STROKES referred to the type of diesel.