The English son-in-law would strategically position himself in the middle of the long dining table during a dinner party (often of 10, if not 12 or 14, people), so that food that gets passed down the table would go past him.
He would also hog the red wine, his preferred tipple, putting it in front of him. On one occasion, he even wrapped his hands around the bottle and said to everyone present, “This is MINE. You can have the white wine, but this is MINE.” I had to bite my tongue each time.
At one of these dinner parties, I was unfortunate enough to be seated opposite him — in the middle of the long table.
On my right, however, was his French father-in-law, so I decided to have some fun.
I grabbed the bottle of red wine and offered it to the father-in-law, who accepted with great enthusiasm. I poured the father-in-law a full glass as the son-in-law looked on helplessly, then absent-mindedly forgot to put it back in front of him, leaving it by the father-in-law instead.
When the father-in-law had finished the first glass, I offered the wine to him again.
I grabbed the bottle of red wine and offered it to the father-in-law, who accepted with great enthusiasm. I poured the father-in-law a full glass as the son-in-law looked on helplessly, then absent-mindedly forgot to put it back in front of him, leaving it by the father-in-law instead.
When the father-in-law had finished the first glass, I offered the wine to him again.
In this way, I polished off the whole bottle of his precious red wine for him.
(France, 2011/12)
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