Saturday 23 February 2019

How to discipline the customers: 2 (London)



Customers often use the menus as place mats, which means they’re either ruined (if they’re the one-sheet paper menus) or we have to wipe them down (if they’re the harder, cardboard type) to get rid of sticky dried-up alcohol or food stains.  Either way, it’s a wasteful practice: un-ecological and un-ergonomic, not to mention uneconomical.

Professional etiquette prevents me from telling them that the menus are not place mats — let alone telling them off for leaving sticky marks on them and making extra work for us — so I try as much as possible to subtly raise their awareness by saying, when I approach a table with plates of food: “Let me clear some space for you.  Can you hand me the menus, please?  Now, that’s much better, isn’t it?”

Last week, I delivered food to a group of four men in their 40s at Table 14.  One of them, when asked to hand me the menu, said, “It’s OK.  I’d like to keep it here.”  I took the opportunity to sneak my message in, “Well, menus are not really place mats,” but he insisted he’d like to leave it there — this exchange was all done in a civil manner, by the way.  I let my eyes linger on the menu for a few seconds before putting his food down on the menu-turned-place-mat, then looked dolefully at the plate of food sitting on the menu before I walked away.

A few minutes later, when I went back to them for the routine check-back (for quality of food, in case there are complaints), I saw that the menu had gone from under his plate.  I said, with my usual good-customer-service bright smile, “Oh!  You’ve lost your place mat!”

He said, with a contrite look, pointing at the menu now sitting on the chair beside him, “You looked so unhappy about it, so I thought I should remove it.  I’m so sorry.  Will you forgive me?” 

Haha, the trick worked!!  I was very touched all the same.

(London, 2019)

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